A Theology for Married Couples

Foreword 5
Prologue 11
Chapter 1. Becoming a True Couple 15
A Workaholic Husband
“You know I Still Love You, Right?”
Loving God & Loving Spouse
The Touchstone to Diagnose Spiritual State
Apply with the Fear of God
They Have Become, But Need to Become
A Triangle with God as the Apex
● Questions for Sharing and Application

Chapter 2. A Couple’s Love Can Change 37
Does a Couple’s Love Never Change?
What Is the Will to Love Between a Couple?
Because of the Covenant, Not the Love of the Couple
Does Marriage Change a Man?
Marriage Changes a Woman Too!
● Questions for Sharing and Application

Chapter 3. Leave, Unite, and Become One 53
Three Elements of Covenant Marriage
When a Man Won’t Leave His Parents
Filial Piety Requires a Good Marriage
When a Man Does Not Unite with His Wife
When a Couple Doesn’t Become One Flesh
Church Women Tamed by Asceticism
God-Given, Beautiful Sexual Desire
Sexual Desire and Lust Are Different!
Sexual Desire and Covenant
Lust Is Idolatry
Experience Holy Affection
● Questions for Sharing and Application

Chapter 4. Upgrading Marital Love 97
How to Overcome Christian Boredom
Defining the Concept of Overcoming Boredom
Distinguishing Affection from Emotion
Holy Affection and the Emotion of Love
Love on Another Level
● Questions for Sharing and Application

Chapter 5. A Couple Loves and Dreams Together 129
A Couple Dreaming of the Kingdom of God
A Couple on a Mission Armed with Love
What Is a Couple’s Mission Together?
Precious Because You Are Not Permanent
The Mystical Union of Christ and the Church
First Love and Last Love
● Questions for Sharing and Application

Chapter 6. Enjoy a Happy Marriage 165
Marital Sex to Renew the Covenant
Kissing, a Sublime Act of Homage
The Joy of Satisfying Your Spouse
A Couple Bearing the Image of God
A Mutually Submissive Couple
Starting Point for Your Child’s Education
● Questions for Sharing and Application

Chapter 7. Real-Life Situations with Bickering 191
Fervent in Faith but Often Fight
Failure Even When Faith Is Fervent
A Very Wise Husband
Man Cave Time
A Couple Navigating Menopause Wisely
Men’s Language vs. Women’s language
Need for Recognition, a Sense of Empathy
Ability to Fight and Reconcile Wisely
Tears Shed while Looking into the Face
A Wife Putting No Hope in Her Husband
God Alone Is Not Enough
● Questions for Sharing and Application

Chapter 8. Divorce, Remarriage, and Reality 225
A Boy Growing Up in a Divorced Family
The Bizarre World of Divorce Today
A Biblical Ground for Divorce #1: Adultery of a Spouse
A Biblical Ground for Divorce #2: Refusal of an Unbelieving Spouse
Unstated Grounds for Divorce
The Cases in Which You Can Remarry
Realistic Problems of Remarriage
Remarriage Is Not Always a Good Thing
One Day We Will Be Alone
● Questions for Sharing and Application
Epilogue 259
Bibliography 261

The news that my wife had been diagnosed with stomach cancer was like slamming on the brakes while driving. I was half forced to put down the ministries I had been immersed in, and I realized how neglectful I had been of my wife. (아내의 위암 진단은 운전 중에 급브레이크 페달을 밟는 기분이었다. 그동안 몰입했던 사역을 반강제로 내려놓고, 비로소 아내에게 얼마나 무심했는가를 인지하게 되었다.)

Verse 31 is Paul’s quotation of Genesis 2:24, and verse 32 is a commentary on that verse (Gen. 2:24). In other words, God created the institution of marriage, the union of husband and wife (v. 31), which means “the great mystery,” and the reason marriage is a great mystery is because it ultimately speaks of Christ and the church (v. 32). (에베소서 5장 31절은 창세기 2장 24절을 바울이 인용한 것이고, 32절은 그 구절에 대한 주석이다. 하나님이 남편과 아내의 결합이라는 결혼 제도를 만드셨는데(31절), 결혼이 큰 비밀인 이유는 궁극적으로 그리스도와 교회를 말하기 때문이다(32절).)