베개 10호

베개 김호애 ································································· 009
베개의 말 조원규 ···························································· 011

### 시 I

영종 이후 강이림 ···························································· 015
물고기 꿈 배새아 ···························································· 018
갤러리 가기 오유리 ························································· 022
호우 윤루 ······································································ 025
Pay it forward 음채유 ···················································· 028
이 집에 꽃이 필요한 이유 이주희 ······································· 035
론 뮤익 정고요 ······························································· 039
환미 이승혜 ···································································· 043
독자 지곡 ······································································· 046
얼룩 채두리 ···································································· 050
사이 최보슬 ···································································· 054
연필심 하은빈 ································································· 057
어떤 하루 황찬영 ···························································· 061
영화관 황해담 ································································· 063

### 10분 희곡

명작 한소정 ···································································· 069

### 스케치

건망증 윤가람 ································································· 085
여름이 오고 있어 황소정 ················································· 087
모자 안병현 ···································································· 090
히라가나 홍여문 ····························································· 093
반딧불 신이수 ································································· 096
안국역 앞에서 강산 ························································· 098
웃음 문유소 ···································································· 102
그게 예뻐요? 최열무 ······················································· 106
할머니의 정원 비올레타 코발료바 ···································· 109
봄 비올레타 코발료바 ····················································· 111

### 시 II

알맞은 시절 김호애 ························································· 117
반작용(/여름 심장) 이림 ················································· 120
축경식 정원에서 김재경 ·················································· 124
흐르는 잡귀신들의 질병과 다정 희음 ································ 128
좋은 일 이초원 ······························································· 133
누설 도하은 ···································································· 136
깨끗하고 밝은 곳 고수진 ················································· 138
냉장고 곽민성 ································································· 146
이 싸움이 끝나면 임수림 ················································· 150
비의 표정 양지승 ···························································· 153
곧 권해수 ······································································· 156
농담 나현빈 ···································································· 158
오늘의 문장 김유이 ························································· 161
노량진 장안아 ································································· 165
너무 많이 인용될 이야기 최강 ·········································· 169
보존주의자들은 누가 보존하는가? 정해진 ·························· 175
저녁이 있는 풍경 김동곤 ················································· 179

### 소설

홈런, 생크림 배트 문소현 ················································ 185
물속에서 잠깐 유재은 ····················································· 212
어부바 윤병헌 ································································· 251

### 에세이

파도의 자리 박소희 ························································· 277
납량 특집: 귀신 가족 이야기 손유미 ·································· 285
엄마가 지나간 자리 박수려 ·············································· 289
서른 살 스승의 날 이재희 ················································ 294
테이프 안정우 ································································· 301
형은 어떻게 임규성 ························································· 305
프루스트의 마들렌이 이런 건가 이승원 ······························ 310
더 이상 엄마의 쓰레기 집에 살지 않지만 선희 ··················· 313
숨은 사라진다 이승현 ····················································· 318
그 숲 마수지 ··································································· 322

## 베개의 말 /조원규

2025년 여름이 서서히 물러가는 것을 봅니다.

『베개』의 호수가 어느덧 두 자릿수에 진입했다는 감회가 있습니다.

『베개 10호』를 내며 가장 마음 쓴 것은 편집자의 취향과 시야를 넘어서는 수용력을 지니는 일이었습니다. 창작가들의 낯선 어법과 감정의 스윙을 받아들이기가 벅찰 때도 있었지만, 그런 어려움을 넘어서는 것이 바로 『베개』를 넓히는 일이었습니다. 『베개』는 안아 들이는 작품들을 통해 비로소 넓어질 것이었습니다.

『베개 10호』에 많은 필자님들을 모실 수 있어 흡족함을 느낍니다. 다른 어느 때보다 많은 시를 싣게 된 것은, 그만큼 외면할 수 없는 응모작이 많았기 때문입니다. 더욱이 이번 호에는 세 편의 소설을 실어 전체 분량도 크게 늘었습니다.

『베개』가 추구하는 것이 무개성적 외연의 확대는 아니라는 생각을 합니다. 글쓰기란 눈에 보이는 영광을 추구하는 단기간의 유한 게임이 아니라는 믿음을 위해 『베개』는 존재하고 싶습니다.

'무한 게임'으로서의 문학이라는 가치 감각이 소실되어 가는 시대인 듯합니다. 어쨌든 『베개』는 '대면과 교감'에—경쟁에서 누구를 이기지 않고도 언제나 가능할 그것에—초점을 둔 매체이자 장소이고자 하지만, 모든 자기모순에서 벗어나지는 못한 상태임을 모르지 않습니다.

작품을 선별하고—따라서 어떤 작품들을 배제하며—그에 따라 수시로 내부와 외부를 만들면서, 『베개』는 마냥 열려 있으니 환영한다는 그런 존재이지는 못한 것 같습니다. 이런 점을 곰곰이 돌이켜 생각합니다.

그럼에도 『베개』를 통해 만나게 되는 새로운 목소리들, 예상치 못한 감동들을 생각하면 이 일을 계속할 이유를 찾게 됩니다. 완벽하지 않더라도 문학의 무한한 가능성을 향해 나아가는 것—모순과 함께라도, 『베개』가 걸어가야 할 길이라고 믿습니다.

관심과 응원에 깊이 감사드립니다.

2025년 9월
『베개』 편집자 올림

[권두시] 베개 / 김호애

베개는 희고
베개는 끌어안을 수 있고
베개는 깃털로 지은 영혼이 있다

베개는 이 방에서 저 방으로 옮겨 다니고
베개는 스스로 흐트러지다가
베개는 때때로 다른 이의 꿈을 대신 꾼다

베개는 내 눈물을 닦아주고
베개는 내가 제 목덜미에 코를 박고 킁킁대도 군말 없다
베개는 상냥도 하지

베개는 시간이 많고
베개는 나이를 먹고
베개는 자라서 베개가 된다

나의 다음 세대의

베개는 물을 싫어하고
베개는 주로 엎드려 있고
베개는 침묵
침묵은 부드러움

베개는 불러도 오지 않고
내가 다가가면 거기에
베개는 가만히

짖는 법도 모른다는 듯

낮은 곳을 향해 머리를 두고
보드라운 배 드러내고
늘 나와 같은 자리에

베개 아래에서 자라나는 뿌리
드리운 나무 그림자를 덮고 잠드는 나

##파도의 자리/ 박소희

그린웨이브는 파도가 아직 깨지기 전, 경사면이 살아있는 상태의 파도를 뜻한다. 파도가 하얗게 깨진 거품 상태는 화이트워시라고 한다. 그린웨이브를 살아있는 파도, 화이트워시를 죽은 파도라고 보통 부른다. 서핑은 살아있는 파도의 경사면을 타고 달리는 일이다.
파도는 쉼 없이 태어나고 죽는다. 물의 표면이 점점 높아지면서 파도는 살아나고, 더 이상 높아질 수 없어진 물이 앞으로 쏟아지면서 죽는다. 파도가 탄생하고 죽는 과정, 그게 서핑하면서 가장 많이 목격하는 풍경이다. 파도가 죽으면 보드는 더 달릴 수 없으므로 파도가 살아있는 순간, 짧게 허락되는 그 생의 면을 타고 달려야 한다.
파도의 탄생과 죽음을 처음부터 지켜보는 일은 언제나 경이롭다. 그 과정을 집중해서 지켜보다 보면 작은 경탄이 나오며 잠시 숨을 멈추게 된다. 아무것도 없는 것 같던 잔잔한 해수면에서 태어나, 어떤 파도는 조금 더 오래 살아 있고, 어떤 파도는 그렇지 않다. 가끔 사람의 생도 파도와 비슷하다는 생각이 든다.
서핑에서 파도에 대해 다음의 표현을 자주 쓴다. 이 표현들에서 '파도'를 '사람'으로 바꾸어 읽을 수도 있을 것 같다.
파도가 아직 살아있다. 파도가 죽는다. 파도를 향해 가다. 파도가 점점 살아난다. 그 파도는 힘이 세다. 파도를 놓쳤다. 파도가 사라졌다. 파도를 찾아 떠난다. 파도를 기다린다. 파도를 그리워한다. 드디어 파도를 만난다.
어쩌면 누군가는 파도의 자리에 어떤 사람의 이름을 넣어 읽을지도 모른다.